Teenage Bodies

It always makes me feel a little bit queasy when we are jettisoned from the modesty of winter into the first weeks of summer with bare flesh on view in abundance, regardless of condition. With two teenagers, an eight year old and a toddler in my house I am surrounded by a fair amount of bare and beautiful skin, which, of late, I have found myself fascinated by.

Teenagers today are more narcissistic than ever, probably due to our modern day diet of celebrity culture and desire for "physical perfection." My 19 year old lifts ridiculously heavy weights and despite regular attempts at telling him that he could strain something I've been repeatedly dismissed as not knowing what I'm talking about. The thing with teenagers is that it doesn't matter how many times you tell them they look great, your opinion as a parent counts for nothing. In the body war, peer group envy is the only marker of success.

I've noticed recently that my son has sprouted a few chest hairs which is quite sweet and reminds me of an old photo of my husband all skinny and smooth chested in his youth. There is nothing more abhorrent to teenagers than the thought that their parents might be noticing their physical form though. Even worse, that they should notice yours, as a friend of mine found when her son walked in on her in the bath only to be completely disgusted by her nakedness.

Which brings me onto my beautiful, blossoming fourteen year old daughter. There is something very wonderful about watching your child morph into an adult before your very eyes. Who can forget the joy of studying a newborn's body, examining and wondering over each fold of perfect plump skin.

Admittedly, with teenagers there is the potential of a rough and spotty ride. That aside, the fascination stems from the fact that the end result is still uncertain and bodies kind of have to grow into themselves. Sometimes if you look at a teenager's face they can look all wrong and yet a few years down the line the parts seem to fit together in a much more balanced way. The same is true of bodies. You get a sudden burst of bosom, which hips and bum then catch up. It really is the last taboo as parents, you know that you shouldn't be talking or thinking about it but you can't help yourself. I find myself staring at my daughter, aware of her emerging sexuality and consciously having to tell myself to stop looking.

When I was pregnant my body suddenly became public property allowing anyone the right to pass comment on my changing shape. Teenagers must run the gauntlet of this phenomena until they get to an age where as suddenly as it started it all just stops, the transition to adulthood complete.

Written for Summer 2009 issue by local midwife and mother of four Janine Knight